I’ve never had a valentine.
Unless you count my mother — the yearly, sole provider of those fancy truffles I like — I’ve never had a significant other to fulfill the clichés of the holiday, and shower me with gifts/candy/giant teddy bears.
When February 14th rolls around, I am perpetually single. The closest I’ve ever gotten to having a valentine was in third grade when the boy I had a crush on dropped a Scooby Doo valentine in my treat bag that read, “You’re Groovy, Valentine!” Since then, I’ve never had anyone make me feel particularly groovy on Valentine’s Day.
Unfortunately, the days of classroom holiday celebrations are long gone. Valentine’s Day for the “grown up” is all about romance, and having a ~special someone~ to share it with. We’ve already established that I’ve always been boyfriendless, and this year is no different. As much as I’d like to have a Joe Jonas look-alike feed me Belgian chocolates, it just ain’t gonna happen. The lovey-dovey mush pushed by every company to sell V-Day-themed products is overwhelming. Do you reeeally need heart shaped pizza to share with your S/O? (Pizza is sexy enough as it is, #amirite?)
I can only think of one thing worse than being single on Valentine’s Day. It’s complaining about being single on Valentine’s Day. Wallowing in self-pity over the lack of a real-life Noah Calhoun won’t make Ryan Gosling appear on your doorstep wrapped in a silk ribbon.
If I’ve learned anything from Beyoncé, it’s that a single lady requires confidence and a certain amount of bad-assery. The strong, single woman doesn’t let the expectations of a materialistic and relationship-centric Valentine’s Day get her down. A day devoted to love goes beyond the romantic love one has for their partner.
So I say shoot down Cupid with his own arrow, and celebrate the holiday with some serious self-love. Buy yourself that new dress you’ve been eyeing. Grab a gal pal, and treat yourselves to a dinner filled with fun, tasty drinks (see below) and gossip. Stay at home with Netflix and ice cream. Whatever you do, remember that the key to a successful single Valentine’s Day lies in doing whatever makes YOU happy.
Although material things are nice, and I truly believe every lady should take a day to treat herself to whatever her heart desires, being happy with one’s singleness takes a bit more than a new pair of shoes. It’s a paradigm shift. It’s understanding and truly believing that you are in charge of your own happiness. The opinion of any man, or any person for that matter, should not devalue your own self worth. A giant box of chocolates from a cute guy with a man bun shouldn’t be the deciding factor of your self-esteem. Owning singleness and radiating confidence from the inside out makes a woman truly beautiful.
This year, I won’t have a valentine. I won’t have someone to tell me I’m pretty by buying me a necklace or some ridiculous material profession of love. Instead, I’ll be kickin’ it with my main homegirl — my beautiful and loving mother, sharing an evening of laughs and chick flicks. Let us know if you wanna go in on a pizza.
Here are some V-Day drinks for you and your galentine to make!
Marshmallow Cake-tini Cocktail
Red Velvet Cake Martini
Cotton Candy Cocktail